Screen Shot 2014-03-09 at 5.21.40 PMHair is known as one’s crown jewel and we as women especially spend lots of time on it.  We are constantly trying to get that right hairstyle, make less oily more oily, free from frizz, straighter, curlier and the list goes on and on.  As an African American woman it can sometimes be overwhelming especially in our culture we classify hair as being good or bad.  In all honesty no matter your ethnic background, color or texture of your hair you have the hair that you were designed to have for life.  The beauty is that we as women have choices what we can do with our hair.

I despise seeing women get criticized for their hair.  I remember when Gabby Douglas won the gold medal and instead of talking about achieving her lifelong dream the focus became on her hair.  Gabby is an athlete and her focus should be on winning her events and not her hair.  Her hair looked fine and it was that way to maintain control during her routines.  It was sad that all we could do was talk about the state of her hair.  To her credit she handled the situation with much class and didn’t bother to address the negative responses returning the attention to her historic win.

Personally growing up I got into the notion that my nappy hair wasn’t the proper grade and the best solution was to chemically relax my hair.  After years of this process I got tired of it because my hair would fall out if it wasn’t properly cared for and there were many times I would have to cut it and start all over again.  I had a desire for longer hair but every time I was near the goal once again I would suffer a setback.  Enter the weave.  The photo above is of me wearing a weave.  I have worn them for years and been subdued to many criticisms as I am ashamed of my own hair, want longer hair and to be fake.  The actual truth is that when I discovered weaves I learned that I was just plain lazy.  I didn’t want to go to the beauty salon every two weeks, oil my hair every other day, spend thirty minutes preparing it for bed every night especially with my traveling job.  The simple truth is that I loved the convenience.

Wearing them for over a decade has also given me license to love my own hair again.  It helped me to understand my hair texture and its needs.  About four years ago I gave up chemical straighteners and wearing the weave gave me the option to transition to my natural hair.  I also learned that my hair is very delicate in its natural state and wearing the weave especially in the winter helps to protect it.  The intent of this blog is not to defend my choice of hairstyles but to say that we women do have a choice and it shouldn’t matter what style we choose via short, medium or long.

The next phase in my choice is that I wear my hair in weaves when it is cold for protection but once we get to warmer weather then I like to wear my own and for a few months in the summer I love to twist my hair.  It is for sheer laziness and the ease of a busy summer as well as when you exercise and sweat.  The twists take hours to complete but once done a person doesn’t have to see their stylist for at least 8-12 weeks.Screen Shot 2014-03-09 at 5.17.25 PM





The best you can do for your hair is to appreciate it as it was given to you.  Does this mean to not color your hair or straighten, perm, go curly, twist it, wear dreads, or just let it all hang?  No it means that we have choices and shouldn’t be belittled or made to feel less of a woman because of those choices.  The point is that it is time to get over whether we have long or short, nappy or straight, color treated or natural color.  The personality of a person far outweighs what is on the top of your head.  You should be proud of your hair no matter what you choose to do with it because in the long run it is you that has to be happy with yourself inside and out.  Personally I love my hair whether I have a receipt for it or if it is combed out in all of its glory.  What I want is to not be defined by my hair but by the person I am always striving to be.  That is my wish for society to get that lesson and accept people for all the ways they wish to express themselves.  I love the versatility that I possess with my hair.  You never know what you will see and a change is always good.  It keeps them guessing! 😉

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